Article: Sydney Morning Herald, December 29th, 2007
It's a fundamental truth: fame, like toilet paper, is fleeting
William McInnes
There are some people, not many, but some, who think I am famous. The security guard at the local supermarket who always asks me what it was like to be on Cop Shop is one. He is a very old security guard. But still he always says hello and points me out to befuddled people in the supermarket.
Once a man approached me uncertainly after encountering the nice security guard and muttered in stilted English: "You ... the man ... there say you ... where is toilet ... paper? You please." I nodded and took the man down the aisle to the toilet paper.
And it's here that the question of fame is interesting. If you were really famous, would you want people pointing you out in the supermarket aisles as you debate whether you are going to be environmentally sound and buy recycled and unbleached toilet paper, or just let yourself go and indulge in a minor pleasure of purchasing soft as velvet two-ply white-as-snow toilet tissue?
Hmmmm.
I guess if you are really famous then you get someone else to go and rage about which toilet paper should be gracing your arse. But perhaps it's nice to go out shopping and drift through the aisles looking at stuff, having a chat to people. Perhaps really famous people wouldn't be able to do that. And if that were the case then why would you want to be famous? What is it about fame that drives people to seek it?
I was on a television series once that was basically all about being famous. Well, not exactly, but that was the end result of being on it. We all got a buzz out of being recognised in the street.
The most important day of the week was the rehearsal day. You'd be given your week's mail, your fan mail. People would sit around the set and go through this stuff like researchers seeking the truth in ancient manuscripts.
I hardly used to get any; a couple of loopy people from the back of beyond would write and invite me to go shooting - but really that was about it. What I did like to do was to write fan mail to my co-actors. At first it was a mild joke, but so seriously were these forms of correspondence taken that they soon became my main form of entertainment. They became so outrageously fawning and sycophantic that I was sure my co-workers would twig. Indeed, the letters all had the same postcode. But no, they would read these things and believe that some fan had written singing their praises.
Being famous blinds you. You live in a bubble. It is a part of the job you have, and so you have to believe it, to a certain extent. But the fact that otherwise sensible people who happen to be on the telly believe that small shrines are being built for them in Longreach, and that people come and pray beside them for healing, or that sailors in the Royal Australian Navy write your name on ballistic missiles as a form of love and devotion is something I think a little sad.
It is also terribly human. So don't feel sorry for the famous.
All of us live and die. All of us are on this earth for a finite time. Some try to cheat that mortality by seeking fame. It is encouraged, for famous people take us outside ourselves. They allow us to dally in another world. Even talking about the famous passes the time. What has Nicole had done? What has Russell done now? And is Hugh really that nice?
Fame is ostensibly an indication of success, of worth and importance. Even powerful people seem to like being famous. This is where fame is a bit weird. Because you are famous it doesn't mean you are worth any more than any other member of society. But just try to tell that to people on awards nights. You have an award, and a television camera and a microphone and you will have a truly accurate example of the pure stupidity and human silliness of being famous.
People who are about as functional as a two-dollar watch stand before us and lecture on how what they have done is important and meaningful, how they thank us for our support. They tell us little morality stories about who they are and how their success can inspire us all.
Being famous lets you hide your failures - your broken promises, your cheapness and inability to cope with life - by glorying in them and celebrating them in public.
I have worked with some of these types of people. And they are not bad people. Talented people, far more talented than me. But still just people - and that's too easy to forget. Fame is fleeting.
It's a fashion and nothing changes quicker than fashion.
So next time I'm in the local supermarket debating which toilet paper to buy and the friendly old security guard waves and points me out to puzzled shoppers who have no idea who I am, I know what to do. Walk over and say: "It's all right. I'm really not famous, but what do you want, environmentally safe and unbleached or soft, thick and white?"
William McInnes
There are some people, not many, but some, who think I am famous. The security guard at the local supermarket who always asks me what it was like to be on Cop Shop is one. He is a very old security guard. But still he always says hello and points me out to befuddled people in the supermarket.
Once a man approached me uncertainly after encountering the nice security guard and muttered in stilted English: "You ... the man ... there say you ... where is toilet ... paper? You please." I nodded and took the man down the aisle to the toilet paper.
And it's here that the question of fame is interesting. If you were really famous, would you want people pointing you out in the supermarket aisles as you debate whether you are going to be environmentally sound and buy recycled and unbleached toilet paper, or just let yourself go and indulge in a minor pleasure of purchasing soft as velvet two-ply white-as-snow toilet tissue?
Hmmmm.
I guess if you are really famous then you get someone else to go and rage about which toilet paper should be gracing your arse. But perhaps it's nice to go out shopping and drift through the aisles looking at stuff, having a chat to people. Perhaps really famous people wouldn't be able to do that. And if that were the case then why would you want to be famous? What is it about fame that drives people to seek it?
I was on a television series once that was basically all about being famous. Well, not exactly, but that was the end result of being on it. We all got a buzz out of being recognised in the street.
The most important day of the week was the rehearsal day. You'd be given your week's mail, your fan mail. People would sit around the set and go through this stuff like researchers seeking the truth in ancient manuscripts.
I hardly used to get any; a couple of loopy people from the back of beyond would write and invite me to go shooting - but really that was about it. What I did like to do was to write fan mail to my co-actors. At first it was a mild joke, but so seriously were these forms of correspondence taken that they soon became my main form of entertainment. They became so outrageously fawning and sycophantic that I was sure my co-workers would twig. Indeed, the letters all had the same postcode. But no, they would read these things and believe that some fan had written singing their praises.
Being famous blinds you. You live in a bubble. It is a part of the job you have, and so you have to believe it, to a certain extent. But the fact that otherwise sensible people who happen to be on the telly believe that small shrines are being built for them in Longreach, and that people come and pray beside them for healing, or that sailors in the Royal Australian Navy write your name on ballistic missiles as a form of love and devotion is something I think a little sad.
It is also terribly human. So don't feel sorry for the famous.
All of us live and die. All of us are on this earth for a finite time. Some try to cheat that mortality by seeking fame. It is encouraged, for famous people take us outside ourselves. They allow us to dally in another world. Even talking about the famous passes the time. What has Nicole had done? What has Russell done now? And is Hugh really that nice?
Fame is ostensibly an indication of success, of worth and importance. Even powerful people seem to like being famous. This is where fame is a bit weird. Because you are famous it doesn't mean you are worth any more than any other member of society. But just try to tell that to people on awards nights. You have an award, and a television camera and a microphone and you will have a truly accurate example of the pure stupidity and human silliness of being famous.
People who are about as functional as a two-dollar watch stand before us and lecture on how what they have done is important and meaningful, how they thank us for our support. They tell us little morality stories about who they are and how their success can inspire us all.
Being famous lets you hide your failures - your broken promises, your cheapness and inability to cope with life - by glorying in them and celebrating them in public.
I have worked with some of these types of people. And they are not bad people. Talented people, far more talented than me. But still just people - and that's too easy to forget. Fame is fleeting.
It's a fashion and nothing changes quicker than fashion.
So next time I'm in the local supermarket debating which toilet paper to buy and the friendly old security guard waves and points me out to puzzled shoppers who have no idea who I am, I know what to do. Walk over and say: "It's all right. I'm really not famous, but what do you want, environmentally safe and unbleached or soft, thick and white?"
posted by WilliamWatch at 8:31 PM
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